Season Season 1 · 24 episodes Season 2 · 24 episodes Season 3 · 24 episodes Season 4 · 24 episodes Season 5 · 19 episodes Season 6 · 24 episodes Season 7 · 22 episodes Season 8 · 16 episodes Season 9 · 24 episodes Season 10 · 23 episodes Season 11 · 22 episodes Season 12 · 16 episodes Season started Oct 30, 2014
E1 Pilot Sep 22, 2003
E2 Big Flappy Bastards Sep 29, 2003
E3 Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell Oct 6, 2003
E4 If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap Oct 13, 2003
E5 The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump Oct 20, 2003
E6 Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? Oct 27, 2003
E7 If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake Nov 3, 2003
E8 Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful Nov 10, 2003
E9 Phase One, Complete Nov 17, 2003
E10 Merry Thanksgiving Nov 24, 2003
E11 Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor Dec 15, 2003
E12 Camel Filters and Pheromones Jan 5, 2004
E13 Sarah Like Puny Alan Jan 12, 2004
E14 I Can't Afford Hyenas Feb 2, 2004
E15 Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick Feb 9, 2004
E16 That Was Saliva, Alan Feb 16, 2004
E17 Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats Feb 23, 2004
E18 An Old Flame With a New Wick Mar 1, 2004
E19 I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You Mar 22, 2004
E20 Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark Apr 19, 2004
E21 No Sniffing, No Wowing May 3, 2004
E22 My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet May 10, 2004
E23 Just Like Buffalo May 17, 2004
E24 Can You Feel My Finger? May 24, 2004
E1 Back Off, Mary Poppins Sep 20, 2004
E2 Enjoy Those Garlic Balls Sep 27, 2004
E3 A Bag Full of Jawea Oct 4, 2004
E4 Go Get Mommy's Bra Oct 11, 2004
E5 Bad News from the Clinic? Oct 18, 2004
E6 The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance Oct 25, 2004
E7 A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana Nov 8, 2004
E8 Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers Nov 15, 2004
E9 Yes, Monsignor Nov 22, 2004
E10 The Salmon Under My Sweater Nov 29, 2004
E11 Last Chance to See Those Tattoos Dec 13, 2004
E12 A Lungful of Alan Jan 3, 2005
E13 Zejdz z Zmoich Wlosów (Get Off My Hair) Jan 17, 2005
E14 Those Big Pink Things with Coconut Jan 31, 2005
E15 Smell the Umbrella Stand Feb 7, 2005
E16 Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth? Feb 14, 2005
E17 Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam! Feb 21, 2005
E18 It Was 'Mame', Mom Mar 7, 2005
E19 A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise Mar 21, 2005
E20 I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey Apr 18, 2005
E21 A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On May 2, 2005
E22 That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother May 9, 2005
E23 Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab May 16, 2005
E24 Does This Smell Funny to You? May 23, 2005
E1 Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts Sep 19, 2005
E2 Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover Sep 26, 2005
E3 Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark Oct 3, 2005
E4 Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs Oct 10, 2005
E5 We Called It Mr. Pinky Oct 17, 2005
E6 Hi, Mr. Horned One Oct 24, 2005
E7 Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop Nov 7, 2005
E8 That Voodoo That I Do Do Nov 14, 2005
E9 Madame and Her Special Friend Nov 21, 2005
E10 Something Salted and Twisted Nov 28, 2005
E11 Santa's Village of the Damned Dec 19, 2005
E12 That Special Tug Jan 9, 2006
E13 Humiliation Is a Visual Medium Jan 23, 2006
E14 Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded Feb 6, 2006
E15 My Tongue Is Meat Feb 27, 2006
E16 Ergo, the Booty Call Mar 6, 2006
E17 The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer Mar 13, 2006
E18 The Spit-Covered Cobbler Mar 20, 2006
E19 Golly Moses, She's a Muffin Apr 10, 2006
E20 Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro Apr 24, 2006
E21 And the Plot Moistens May 1, 2006
E22 Just Once with Aunt Sophie May 8, 2006
E23 Arguments for the Quickie May 15, 2006
E24 That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite May 22, 2006
E1 Working for Caligula Sep 18, 2006
E2 Who Is This Vod Kanockers? Sep 25, 2006
E3 The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress Oct 2, 2006
E4 A Pot-Smokin' Monkey Oct 9, 2006
E5 A Live Woman of Proven Fertility Oct 16, 2006
E6 Apologies for the Frivolity Oct 23, 2006
E7 Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head Nov 6, 2006
E8 Release the Dogs Nov 13, 2006
E9 Corey's Been Dead for an Hour Nov 20, 2006
E10 Kissing Abe Lincoln Nov 27, 2006
E11 Walnuts and Demerol Dec 11, 2006
E12 Castrating Sheep in Montana Jan 8, 2007
E13 Don't Worry, Speed Racer Jan 22, 2007
E14 That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami Feb 5, 2007
E15 My Damn Stalker Feb 12, 2007
E16 Young People Have Phlegm Too Feb 19, 2007
E17 I Merely Slept with a Commie Feb 26, 2007
E18 It Never Rains in Hooterville Mar 19, 2007
E19 Smooth as a Ken Doll Apr 9, 2007
E20 Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot Apr 16, 2007
E21 Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous Apr 23, 2007
E22 Mr. McGlue's Feedbag Apr 30, 2007
E23 Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin' May 7, 2007
E24 Prostitutes and Gelato May 14, 2007
E1 Large Birds, Spiders and Mom Sep 24, 2007
E2 Media Room Slash Dungeon Oct 1, 2007
E3 Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo Oct 8, 2007
E4 City of Great Racks Oct 15, 2007
E5 Putting Swim Fins on a Cat Oct 22, 2007
E6 Help Daddy Find His Toenail Oct 29, 2007
E7 The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room Nov 5, 2007
E8 Is There a Mrs. Waffles? Nov 12, 2007
E9 Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids Nov 19, 2007
E10 Kinda Like Necrophilia Nov 26, 2007
E11 Meander to Your Dander Mar 17, 2008
E12 A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh Mar 24, 2008
E13 The Soil Is Moist Mar 31, 2008
E14 Winky-Dink Time Apr 14, 2008
E15 Rough Night in Hump Junction Apr 21, 2008
E16 Look at Me Mommy, I'm Pretty Apr 28, 2008
E17 Fish in a Drawer May 5, 2008
E18 If My Hole Could Talk May 12, 2008
E19 Waiting for the Right Snapper May 19, 2008
E1 Taterhead Is Our Love Child Sep 22, 2008
E2 Pie Hole, Herb Sep 29, 2008
E3 Damn You, Eggs Benedict Oct 6, 2008
E4 The Flavin' and the Mavin' Oct 13, 2008
E5 A Jock Strap in Hell Oct 20, 2008
E6 It's Always Nazi Week Nov 3, 2008
E7 Best H.O. Money Can Buy Nov 10, 2008
E8 Pinocchio's Mouth Nov 17, 2008
E9 The Mooch at the Boo Nov 24, 2008
E10 He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited Dec 8, 2008
E11 The Devil's Lube Dec 15, 2008
E12 Thank God for Scoliosis Jan 12, 2009
E13 I Think You Offended Don Jan 19, 2009
E14 David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie Feb 2, 2009
E15 I'd Like to Start with the Cat Feb 9, 2009
E16 She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime Mar 2, 2009
E17 The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'? Mar 9, 2009
E18 My Son's Enormous Head Mar 16, 2009
E19 The Two Finger Rule Mar 30, 2009
E20 Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau Apr 13, 2009
E21 Above Exalted Cyclops Apr 27, 2009
E22 Sir Lancelot's Litter Box May 4, 2009
E23 Good Morning Mrs. Butterworth May 11, 2009
E24 Baseball Was Better with Steroids May 18, 2009
E1 818-JKLPUZO Sep 21, 2009
E2 Whipped Unto the Third Generation Sep 28, 2009
E3 Mmm, Fish. Yum. Oct 5, 2009
E4 Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator Oct 12, 2009
E5 For the Sake of the Child Oct 19, 2009
E6 Give Me Your Thumb Nov 2, 2009
E7 Untainted by Filth Nov 9, 2009
E8 Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. Nov 16, 2009
E9 Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair Nov 23, 2009
E10 That's Why They Call It "Ball Room" Dec 7, 2009
E11 Warning, It's Dirty Dec 14, 2009
E12 Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste Jan 11, 2010
E13 Yay, No Polyps! Jan 18, 2010
E14 Crude and Uncalled For Feb 1, 2010
E15 Aye, Aye, Captain Douche Feb 8, 2010
E16 Tinkle Like a Princess Mar 1, 2010
E17 I Found Your Moustache Mar 8, 2010
E18 Ixnay on the Oggie Day Mar 22, 2010
E19 Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave Apr 12, 2010
E20 I Called Him Magoo May 10, 2010
E21 Gumby with a Pokey May 17, 2010
E22 This Is Not Gonna End Well May 24, 2010
E1 Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud Sep 20, 2010
E2 A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer Sep 27, 2010
E3 A Pudding-Filled Cactus Oct 4, 2010
E4 Hookers, Hookers, Hookers Oct 11, 2010
E5 The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel Oct 18, 2010
E6 Twanging Your Magic Clanger Oct 25, 2010
E7 The Crazy Bitch Gazette Nov 1, 2010
E8 Springtime on a Stick Nov 8, 2010
E9 A Good Time in Central Africa Nov 15, 2010
E10 Ow, Ow, Don't Stop Nov 22, 2010
E11 Dead from the Waist Down Dec 6, 2010
E12 Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead Dec 13, 2010
E13 Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup Jan 3, 2011
E14 Lookin' for Japanese Subs Jan 17, 2011
E15 Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak Feb 7, 2011
E16 That Darn Priest Feb 14, 2011
E1 Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt Sep 19, 2011
E2 People Who Love Peepholes Sep 26, 2011
E3 Big Girls Don't Throw Food Oct 3, 2011
E4 Nine Magic Fingers Oct 10, 2011
E5 A Giant Cat Holding a Churro Oct 17, 2011
E6 The Squat and Hover Oct 24, 2011
E7 Those Fancy Japanese Toilets Oct 31, 2011
E8 Thank You for the Intercourse Nov 7, 2011
E9 Frodo's Headshots Nov 14, 2011
E10 A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes Nov 21, 2011
E11 What a Lovely Landing Strip Dec 5, 2011
E12 One False Move, Zimbabwe! Dec 12, 2011
E13 Slowly and in a Circular Fashion Jan 2, 2012
E14 A Possum on Chemo Jan 16, 2012
E15 The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack Feb 6, 2012
E16 Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy Feb 13, 2012
E17 Not in My Mouth! Feb 20, 2012
E18 The War Against Gingivitis Feb 27, 2012
E19 Palmdale, Ech Mar 19, 2012
E20 Grandma's Pie Apr 9, 2012
E21 Mr. Hose Says "Yes" Apr 16, 2012
E22 Why We Gave Up Women Apr 30, 2012
E23 The Straw in My Donut Hole May 7, 2012
E24 Oh Look! Al-Qaeda! May 14, 2012
E1 I Changed My Mind About the Milk Sep 27, 2012
E2 A Big Bag of Dog Oct 4, 2012
E3 Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt Oct 11, 2012
E4 You Do Know What the Lollipop's For Oct 18, 2012
E5 That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam Oct 25, 2012
E6 Ferrets, Attack! Nov 1, 2012
E7 Avoid the Chinese Mustard Nov 8, 2012
E8 Something My Gynecologist Said Nov 15, 2012
E9 I Scream When I Pee Nov 29, 2012
E10 One Nut Johnson Dec 6, 2012
E11 Give Santa a Tail-Hole Dec 13, 2012
E12 Welcome to Alancrest Jan 3, 2013
E13 Grab a Feather and Get in Line Jan 10, 2013
E14 Run, Steven Staven! Run! Jan 31, 2013
E15 Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It Feb 7, 2013
E16 Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby Feb 14, 2013
E17 Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries Feb 21, 2013
E18 The 9:04 from Pemberton Mar 7, 2013
E19 Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon Mar 14, 2013
E20 Bazinga! That's from a TV Show Apr 4, 2013
E21 Another Night with Neil Diamond Apr 25, 2013
E22 My Bodacious Vidalia May 2, 2013
E23 Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped May 9, 2013
E1 Nangnangnangnang Sep 26, 2013
E2 I Think I Banged Lucille Ball Oct 3, 2013
E3 This Unblessed Biscuit Oct 10, 2013
E4 Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank Oct 17, 2013
E5 Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003 Oct 24, 2013
E6 Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants Nov 7, 2013
E7 Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie Nov 14, 2013
E8 Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room. Nov 21, 2013
E9 Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer Dec 5, 2013
E10 On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer! Dec 12, 2013
E11 Tazed in the Lady Nuts Jan 2, 2014
E12 Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball. Jan 9, 2014
E13 Bite Me, Supreme Court Jan 30, 2014
E14 Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe Feb 6, 2014
E15 Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin Feb 27, 2014
E16 How to Get Rid of Alan Harper Mar 6, 2014
E17 Welcome Home, Jake Mar 13, 2014
E18 West Side Story Apr 3, 2014
E19 Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang Apr 10, 2014
E20 Lotta Delis in Little Armenia Apr 24, 2014
E21 Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot May 1, 2014
E22 Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead May 8, 2014
E1 The Ol' Mexican Spinach Oct 30, 2014
E2 A Chic Bar in Ibiza Nov 6, 2014
E3 Glamping in a Yurt Nov 13, 2014
E4 Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight Nov 20, 2014
E5 Oontz. Oontz. Oontz. Nov 27, 2014
E6 Alan Shot a Little Girl Dec 4, 2014
E7 Sex with an Animated Ed Asner Dec 11, 2014
E8 Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey Dec 18, 2014
E9 Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey Jan 8, 2015
E10 Here I Come, Pants! Jan 15, 2015
E11 For Whom the Booty Calls Jan 22, 2015
E12 A Beer-Battered Rip-Off Jan 29, 2015
E13 Boompa Loved His Hookers Feb 5, 2015
E14 Don't Give a Monkey a Gun Feb 12, 2015
E15 Of Course He's Dead (1) Feb 19, 2015
E16 Of Course He's Dead (2) Feb 19, 2015